5th Jul 2011, 10:00 PM
in Ch 4: Not the Same
Author Notes:
Jocelyn
5th Jul 2011, 10:00 PM
Here’s a fun fact that a lot of folks don’t realize - or at least, won’t accept - about transgendered people: for most of us, if we could just NOT be transgendered, we would. Although I hesitate to call it an entirely horrible experience in every way, it IS painful, troublesome, lonely and just generally unfortunate to have to be like this.
I’ve heard a lot of cisgendered people who seem to insist that we can just turn it off and stop being transgendered at any time (not much different from the argument that “being gay is a choice” really). But if someone’s never been in a situation like that or had such feelings, how can they make a claim like that and call it fact?
I mean, you wouldn’t trust someone’s opinion on a movie if they never saw the movie, right?
Just some food for thought, I suppose.
©2004-2011
Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.
I’ve heard a lot of cisgendered people who seem to insist that we can just turn it off and stop being transgendered at any time (not much different from the argument that “being gay is a choice” really). But if someone’s never been in a situation like that or had such feelings, how can they make a claim like that and call it fact?
I mean, you wouldn’t trust someone’s opinion on a movie if they never saw the movie, right?
Just some food for thought, I suppose.
©2004-2011
Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.
User comments:
I hope they could still stay friends.
He seems like a nice enough guy anyway.
And aw, read your post just now and it's real deep and heart-touching. You have my full support! Live life the way you want! <3
EDIT: I srsly need to catch up with this comic! *still on chap 2* OTL;;;;
You encompass the... problem with being what we are perfectly. I'd give anything to not be transgender, to feel what other people feel, to not hate the mirror, and I'm only just now escaping that feeling, half a year into my transition, after over thirty years.
Thank you.
And yes, I'd give anything to not be transgender, to just be... "normal".
I came out in 2000, as I mentioned earlier. And after a couple years of friend support, but not knowing what to do, or where to go to next, I took a step back "in the closet".
I continued to get mani/pedis, grow my hair long, and wear earrings. Many people just assumed I was "different", but happy. In reality, I was dying inside, watching cis-girls walk by and wishing I could be them. Or worse, wishing that an oncoming semi would end my pain.
But I gained new friends at work. And those friends helped me be myself, to truly be myself and to look for help with it. And now, three years later, I am more happy than I can remember being, because I am me.
I still wish that I was a cis-woman, but I would never want to hide myself again.
But yeah, I at 25 am only just realizing that I am a) definitely not cis and b) probably a transwoman. I realized late (although I'd questioned five years before, too) because I have pretty minimal dysphoria, but have a distinct euphoria for being a woman. Best case scenario for me, I think, would be to just...be a cis-woman. But even with a lowish amount of dysphoria, I'd still rather be a transwoman over being cis. (I think. I definitely prefer being feminine and was fairly fem way before I realized I was trans. Feeling normal would be nice, but at the same time I don't think there's a single part of me that actually wants to be a guy / masculine.) Worth noting though that, I'm super new to this and have only outed myself to friends and they've all been supportive, so I don't know the half of what most trans people go through in terms of discrimination and fear and dysphoria. But I'm guessing that'll change a little as I progress and start openly presenting fem in more places, and if I start taking hormones. (And oh no, homophobia and fetishization will also be a thing I'll have to face, oh dear, that'll probably be rough in a conservative state).
Lol but anyway back to happy things, this comic is so cute, and I love it!
I agree with your conclusion: being trans sucks, but I´ll take being a trans woman over being a cis man any day.
Or as a lesbian friend of mine put it, a few years ago. "You think being homosexual is a CHOICE? OK. Fine. But just think about this. TRY being gay, yourself. I'm not saying go out and have sex with someone of the same gender. Just imagine, for a moment, being gay. Can't do it, right? Well being straight is no more of a choice for ME, then being gay is, for you."