After an exhausting day, I'm posting this page really late in the day. Unfortunately, I'm just fumbling over my words now and can't seem to work out what I want to say for my blurb. So instead, tell me what you think.
This can be a problem in relationships where one person is really into physical stuff, and the other just isn't. But hey, better to be honest about it with each other than to force yourself to be uncomfortable.
Even if she wasn't Ace and a victim of sexual harassment, don't forget Chanel is 14. Even without her history, she'd be bound to feel uncomfortable displaying herself in underwear, and someone (even someone close like a girlfriend) seeing and touching parts of her body that are usually covered in clothing.
I completely understand your point, but I don't remember where it said Nelly had been sexually harassed..? Would someone mind giving me the link/page number please? Thank you
Well, yes, that's so. Of course Maria did very well and I'm sure she considered all that
I was just pointing out that it's telling how early on in their relationship they are. Otherwise, this would have already come up enough already, been talked out and an understanding reached as to what she is and isn't comfortable with. Just saying.
I just want to respond to people commenting on 'how far along' Chanel and Maria are in their relationship. That term makes me pretty uncomfortable. It assumes romantic relationships follow a linear progression of increasing physical intimacy, and assumes that seeing each other in not much underwear or some touching is on the "early" side of that. As a person in an ace relationship and a fan of relationship anarchy, that kind of throws me off. Consent is not something you sort out once and are done with for the rest of your relationship, it is a constant conversation, and there is no one set of things that makes a romantic relationship a romantic one.
Everyone has different boundaries of what they are or are not comfortable with that may change depending on situation and time, and this comic does a beautiful job of portraying consent and communication. Every relationship is unique, and part of the beauty relationships is navigating situations like these.
(Sorry if my comment before seemed nitpicky or aggressive. I only mean to make people who might feel the same way as me a little more comfortable or help others who are navigating relationships.)
I'm gonna leave this comment here simply because I just binge read the entire comic in between work breaks and on weekends, but as someone who's recently come to terms with the initial concept of /being/ transgendered in the first place, (like many others, I've denied it for years, or the dysphoria simply wasn't strong enough for me to consider transition), your comic is lovely.
It's been an absolute joy to read through such deep and positive representation, and several points have been brought up that have forced me to think about me, and my life, and what I want. And it's been a fundamental piece of me just... Figuring out who I am.
There's a couple blurbs that really stick with me but I don't want to write a full dissertation on your comic. I'll just say that the fact that unlike everyone else, Jessica didn't really seem to know from birth, that stuck with me. Because that's been my experience. I only even began to consider it when I was 13, and I shoved it down in the deepest corners of my brain until I was 20. Only when I was 22 was I even comfortable with the genderqueer label, and that wasn't even quite right.
I know who I am now. It's just... Actually making everyone else in my life aware of that too. But I'll make it, I've got a wonderful girlfriend that understands and supports me, a friend across the world going through my exact same situation, and parents that will... Probably and hopefully still love me after I break the news to them.
The coworkers are a whole 'nother story, but I'm done living in the shadow of my misery. And if nothing else, your story has helped me find that.
Thank you for producing such a wonderful webcomic.
My girlfriend and I are actually both ace, but we still bump into a similar problem a lot. The boundaries for what is and isn't sexual tends to be different for everybody, so we kind of have to navigate it together. It also does involve having about the same feelings as Chanel, just because sexuality is just so expected, we feel bad when we just don't feel comfortable with things. And that's just crazy because we're both asexual, so you'd think it would be fine
Can we all just take a moment to marvel at how beautiful an exchange of consent this is!?!?!
Maria presents the options without any sort of pressure for Chanel to choose one way or another, and when Chanel expresses guilt over making the right choice for herself (woo Chanel!) Maria steps in and reaffirms her right to make that choice. For Maria, anything that Chanel is not comfortable with is not something she would take pleasure in doing. Chanel is not letting her down, she is exercising her autonomy and making the right decision for herself. That is really touching and beautiful to have in a story, especially when so much of our media is filled with little to no consent.
I like this page, because even as an ace dating another ace, I know very well that there are those moments. And they are awkward and you feel uncomfortable, but its just part of the territory of being or I guess dating an ace. Sometimes you just have to say, nope not me. Just that conflict in general, at least for me, goes with everybody step in the relationship. Although, Chanel apologizes more than she needs to a lot, but I think that's a Chanel thing.
Well, yes, that's so. Of course Maria did very well and I'm sure she considered all that
I was just pointing out that it's telling how early on in their relationship they are. Otherwise, this would have already come up enough already, been talked out and an understanding reached as to what she is and isn't comfortable with. Just saying.
Everyone has different boundaries of what they are or are not comfortable with that may change depending on situation and time, and this comic does a beautiful job of portraying consent and communication. Every relationship is unique, and part of the beauty relationships is navigating situations like these.
Keep up the amazing work Jocelyn! :)
It's been an absolute joy to read through such deep and positive representation, and several points have been brought up that have forced me to think about me, and my life, and what I want. And it's been a fundamental piece of me just... Figuring out who I am.
There's a couple blurbs that really stick with me but I don't want to write a full dissertation on your comic. I'll just say that the fact that unlike everyone else, Jessica didn't really seem to know from birth, that stuck with me. Because that's been my experience. I only even began to consider it when I was 13, and I shoved it down in the deepest corners of my brain until I was 20. Only when I was 22 was I even comfortable with the genderqueer label, and that wasn't even quite right.
I know who I am now. It's just... Actually making everyone else in my life aware of that too. But I'll make it, I've got a wonderful girlfriend that understands and supports me, a friend across the world going through my exact same situation, and parents that will... Probably and hopefully still love me after I break the news to them.
The coworkers are a whole 'nother story, but I'm done living in the shadow of my misery. And if nothing else, your story has helped me find that.
Thank you for producing such a wonderful webcomic.
Maria presents the options without any sort of pressure for Chanel to choose one way or another, and when Chanel expresses guilt over making the right choice for herself (woo Chanel!) Maria steps in and reaffirms her right to make that choice. For Maria, anything that Chanel is not comfortable with is not something she would take pleasure in doing. Chanel is not letting her down, she is exercising her autonomy and making the right decision for herself. That is really touching and beautiful to have in a story, especially when so much of our media is filled with little to no consent.