Comic 849 - Envy

21st Jun 2016, 5:30 PM in Ch. 29: Transitions
Average Rating: 5 (8 votes)
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Author Notes:

Jocelyn 21st Jun 2016, 5:30 PM edit delete
I relate to a lot of this page more than I think I like to admit. Confusing attraction with envy. Beating myself up because someone else looks better than me. Having my friends politely tell me to shut up because I look fine. I'm not nearly as bad as I used to be about any of this, but it's definitely a process I've experienced a lot throughout my teens and twenties. Something I'm sure a lot of trans folk go through, to be honest.

And the last two panels, in case you've forgotten, remind us that Rain's endo date is coming up soon. I don't know why Rudy and Chanel always end up being the first two people Rain tells about advances in her transition. It's not really intentional on my part; it just kinda always ends up being them (although you can probably assume Emily's been told off-screen; even if they weren't dating, it'd be hard for her to not hear about this with their current living conditions). XD

Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.

As you may probably know by now, I'm saving up for my (hopefully) upcoming SRS date in a few months. If you're able, you can help me out. Buying books, or shirts, or just plain donations are all very helpful right now. Our Etsy shop is back open too, for bracelets and wristbands. Obviously, if you are unable to or don't want to offer anything monetary, that's totally fine and I completely understand. There are other ways you can help. Like voting for Rain on TopWebComics or joining/sharing the Facebook page (or even just telling your friends!) can help spread the word about my work. Thanks for anything you can do; no hard feelings if you can't. ^_^
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Reimi 21st Jun 2016, 6:07 PM edit delete reply
Confusing Attraction with envy, that one hits close to home. Still don't know what I prefer at all, just that it distracted me for quite some time.
RyuJenn 22nd Jun 2016, 11:39 AM edit delete reply
I know exactly what you mean! Took me years to realize that's what i was doing and even now i still don't know for sure what i'm actually attracted to
Samantha 22nd Jun 2016, 5:55 PM edit delete reply
I don't believe there's anything to confuse honestly. Something my sister said once stuck with me. She talked about Jung (my least favorite psychologist, I prefer Erik Erikson and Maslow) and sorta tied it in with that people tend to be attracted to people because of qualities they want in themselves.
It's okay to be envious. And you can be attracted to someone because they have qualities that are beautiful to you. I like women, and I wish I could be a woman sometimes. I shrug it off and remind myself that it's okay that I have some things they will never have to deal with, and vice versa.
EpicSD 21st Jun 2016, 7:33 PM edit delete reply
has anyone had the problem of getting a job but you cant be you'er gender?
Lemonado Girl 21st Jun 2016, 7:46 PM edit delete reply
Lemonado Girl
Oooooh boy, hormones and appearance. My face is so unsightly for me, I can hardly stand it, especially with my hair at this awkward length...
thatguyinthecorner 21st Jun 2016, 10:59 PM edit delete reply
Nuuuuu don't say that! Your face is adorable! Certainly nicer than my rigid, acne-riddled mug!

Plus you actually get happy and excited about stuff so you don't have my dead, soulless eyes.

Srsly though, you're freaking adorable.
Guest 21st Jun 2016, 10:32 PM edit delete reply
lol @ Gavin's hardcore blushing in the background
Glad to see that Rudy appears happy for Rain (in contrast to his suddenly feeling sick in chapter 15)
mecaterpillar 21st Jun 2016, 11:20 PM edit delete reply
So has Ana really not noticed Rain's hair still? Maybe Rain never left much of an impression on Ana since Ana only saw her a little bit over the course of 6 or so weeks?
Guest 22nd Jun 2016, 10:36 PM edit delete reply
I don't think she's been able to acknowledge it since she's talking to Gavin and stuff right now
purplespacecats 22nd Jun 2016, 12:18 AM edit delete reply
uuf, the whole "am i attracted to her or do i want to be her???" thing is real af for wlw in general, both cis and trans
Chase 22nd Jun 2016, 5:28 AM edit delete reply
Meep - Very much hit home with this one.
Evalyn-Averis 22nd Jun 2016, 7:07 AM edit delete reply
Admittedly I still have that even after starting hormones.... Just wishing...
But in the end my thoughts finally circle around to something my partner once told me. "I believe that trans is an unneeded word, you're as much like me and my other friends I have are perfect the way they see themselves in my mind you're a girl, a women, that is beyond beautiful."
guest 22nd Jun 2016, 11:13 AM edit delete reply
Your friend gets it. I wish more people could see so plainly.
Guest 22nd Jun 2016, 5:45 PM edit delete reply
Really? Rain always seemed somewhat outgoing,in my opinion, anyways.
Reimi 23rd Jun 2016, 2:37 AM edit delete reply
Any chance of a limited edition full color Rain collection through Lulu? Maybe with your commentary on each page as well? Would make several of us double dip on the books. :P
Guest 23rd Jun 2016, 3:34 PM edit delete reply
Playtime737684 23rd Jun 2016, 10:12 PM edit delete reply
Hello and thank you for letting me into your beautiful world. I love the comic and the slice of life feel it's giving me I have a New found understanding of transgender and I find myself wanting to get to know more. I love to learn and live with the knowledge that I can make a difference in his or her life as a good friend. And where I can order some copies of your book from ? Thank you again
no 13th Nov 2020, 3:47 AM edit delete reply
ahhh, yes: ¨do i want to be her or do i want to be with her?¨
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