Comic 821 - All That I Am

12th Apr 2016, 12:12 AM in Ch. 28: Love, Trust, and Respect
All That I Am
Average Rating: 5 (17 votes)
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Author Notes:

Jocelyn 12th Apr 2016, 12:12 AM edit delete
Remember that time I said I'd never do another three-pager? ^^;

REALLY early update! You didn't want to wait to see how this turned out. I didn't want an extra day of agonizing over second-guessing myself (interestingly, considering the context). And it's the last post of a very, very long chapter with a hiatus to follow (return date to be announced another time). So, here we are.

Philosophical question for you all: what is more foolish? Trying something even though you know could fail and the consequences for failure could be exceptionally bad? Or not even trying, even though you very well could succeed, and the reward for success would be exceptionally good? Is either really foolish? Is there a right or wrong answer?

Whether or not you agree with Rain and Emily's actions though, it's still what they chose. Maybe it's a mistake. And if so, they'll have to discover that for themselves and learn from it. That's what growing up is. If it's not a mistake, there will surely still be hardships and things to learn in their future. There's no easy answer, because it's almost never black and white.

But looking at this purely in present tense, these girls both have so much weighing on them right now. And if they believe pursuing this feels right, then I hope it works out for them. ^_^

Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.

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Kitsune_Chan 12th Apr 2016, 5:37 AM edit delete reply
ROFL my friend woke me up calling my facebook non stop telling me to read rain right away XD
I am squealing and rolling around giggling, I am so happy this finally happened in rain.

Best way to start my birthday EVER!!! (Yes it is a birthday today lol)

Woot!! Joclyn ur the best webcomic writer ever!

BTW I think it will work out because all the things they are going through, being there for each other will only make their bonds stronger.
Mina 12th Apr 2016, 2:33 PM edit delete reply
Happy birthday!
Lemonado Girl 12th Apr 2016, 4:37 PM edit delete reply
Lemonado Girl
Happy birthday you glorious person
Guest 12th Apr 2016, 7:35 PM edit delete reply
It's my birthday today too, and I agree that this is a great present.
Artemis-Orion 12th Apr 2016, 7:49 PM edit delete reply
Happy Birthday! =D
Kitsune_Chan 13th Apr 2016, 6:47 PM edit delete reply
Thank you all ^.^
ramona 12th Apr 2016, 5:45 AM edit delete reply
*screams incoherently in lesbish*
Nef 12th Apr 2016, 12:42 PM edit delete reply
I just found this comic, and must confess that I will only start reading it because of your comment. You just made me spill my tea (good thing it's a bit cooled by now)
Artemis-Orion 12th Apr 2016, 6:57 AM edit delete reply


(Sorry, not getting coherent thought out of me on this one. xP)
DramaDork 12th Apr 2016, 7:05 AM edit delete reply
I've been crying all morning and this is the first thing to make me genuinely smile so that you, Jocelyn
Noelle 12th Apr 2016, 7:30 AM edit delete reply
*cries happily, curls into tiny ball, cries happily, collapses into squeegularity*
j-eagle12212012 12th Apr 2016, 7:55 AM edit delete reply
Called it ^_^
SilentNight 12th Apr 2016, 11:00 AM edit delete reply
High five!
Mina 12th Apr 2016, 2:34 PM edit delete reply
Shiped it. ^^
Cas 13th Apr 2016, 12:18 AM edit delete reply
Victor 12th Apr 2016, 8:15 AM edit delete reply
To put it simply I will just use an old quote, "Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all." Nothing ever happened by sitting quietly in a room... So to answer your question, it would have been more foolish to walk away from what they have than to go for it and possibly have it not work. JMO
Niceguy Eddie 12th Apr 2016, 8:20 AM edit delete reply
Not trying is ALWAYS worse. Never forget that or believe otherwise! Very well done, Jocelyn!
DocMesa 12th Apr 2016, 8:51 AM edit delete reply
I think my eardrums just ruptured from a deafening "Squee".
Lemonado Girl 12th Apr 2016, 4:39 PM edit delete reply
Lemonado Girl
Sorry, that would have been me
RoseArtemis 12th Apr 2016, 9:57 AM edit delete reply

I legit screamed when I read this xD
JohnR 12th Apr 2016, 10:08 AM edit delete reply
At the very least Emily will have some help for some time. And at least they'll have each other for some time. It may not work out, but as someone else observed, it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Yay for Rainily!
inurashii 12th Apr 2016, 10:15 AM edit delete reply
Taxidermy Accident 14th Apr 2016, 5:08 PM edit delete reply
Oh no. Los gritos är i olik 言語!!!
Dan 12th Apr 2016, 10:30 AM edit delete reply
*crosses fingers that this works well for both of them*
Long-Time Lurker 12th Apr 2016, 11:45 AM edit delete reply
Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!!! Break my heart and hand me the moon in the same scene. :P

I'm really excited to see where this goes for them. I agree wtih Emily that it *could* turn out bad, and if it might be worse for the baby... but I also picture that if they break up, it'd be amicable and maturely handled where Rain would stay part of the kid's life. I can't picture it being like Emily's parents' situation. Then again, I think they have a really good chance -- as Kitsune_Chan pointed out, all these things they're going through (and already instinctively leaning on each other for support) are just going to make them a stronger couple. They're already acting adorably like a couple unofficially. It's not like making it official will change things all *that* much in terms of their personal dynamic... So yes, given it could negatively impact the child's life if it goes wrong, so it is a bit foolish, BUT I'm with the concensus -- it's more foolish not to try. I think they have a good chance of making it. Here's to hoping! :) And even if they do eventually break up, the child's life will have been enriched more for a few years, so even then it wouldn't be all bad.
-Theo- 12th Apr 2016, 1:09 PM edit delete reply
I mean, this is great...but I was wrong!
KingNolad 12th Apr 2016, 3:14 PM edit delete reply
-Theo- 12th Apr 2016, 3:51 PM edit delete reply
Yes you were
Im still aboard the SS. Fara/Vincent tho
Mina 12th Apr 2016, 2:47 PM edit delete reply
Living is foolish. Reading is foolish. Talking is foolish. Listening to music is foolish. Breathing is foolish. Working is foolish. Believing that it's not foolish is foolish. Franziska is foolish. Behave and eat cupcakes.
... I'm sorry.

It really depends on the context, but generally speaking, I think that it's worth trying. Though "not even trying, even though I very well could succeed, and the reward for success would be exceptionally good" is currently my coming out status... ^^'
Lemonado Girl 12th Apr 2016, 4:40 PM edit delete reply
Lemonado Girl
I hope it works out for you eventually. I was in your boat for a long while.
no 12th Nov 2020, 2:39 PM edit delete reply
those first nine sentences are an exceptional quote
CannibalisticApple 12th Apr 2016, 3:15 PM edit delete reply
I guess I'm one of the only people who's a bit surprised they actually got together?

I'm still a bit worried about how things will go for them since they're starting their relationship at one of the most turbulent points in a person's life, but hopefully they can weather through it.

By the way Jocelyn, did you ever expect Emily's character would head in this direction? I know you've done a few things on a whim (Maria and Chanel), and Emily's early pages almost set her up as a potential antagonist. The Emily/Maria relationship had hints to it, but I have to wonder about Raimily.
KingNolad 12th Apr 2016, 3:15 PM edit delete reply
*dies of happiness*
Catlife333 12th Apr 2016, 3:45 PM edit delete reply
Ahhhhhhh XD YES!!!!!!!

I'm just going to say that going for it is always worth it (I mean unless your relationship is like harmful/unhealthy). But getting into a relationship is always going to take some risks so I'm glad they went for it! :D That's all just my opinion though of course.

Speaking of which though, I'm planning on asking a girl I know out this week, so hope for the best!
Lemonado Girl 12th Apr 2016, 4:36 PM edit delete reply
Lemonado Girl
*emerges from the water, climbs back aboard ship*

Torne 12th Apr 2016, 5:18 PM edit delete reply
Weren't they speaking about sharing a bed moments ago? O.o
AmbiguousMouse 13th Apr 2016, 11:02 PM edit delete reply
I'm pretty sure they were talking about the bed being too small for both of them a few moments ago, much to the chagrin of shippers.
Reimi 12th Apr 2016, 7:25 PM edit delete reply
And so the voyage begins!

Chase 12th Apr 2016, 7:51 PM edit delete reply
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! :D
VDani 12th Apr 2016, 10:10 PM edit delete reply
Was *NOT* expecting this.

Best chapter end ever.

Need a cold shower to cool my internal lesbian.
Trin 12th Apr 2016, 10:23 PM edit delete reply
This page reminded me of this song:
The Laughing Man 13th Apr 2016, 12:14 AM edit delete reply
As a mid-thirties hetero male with a fairly epic beard, I feel slightly embarrassed that I just squealed a bit. Why must you gives to me the feels?
Absentia 16th Apr 2021, 1:27 PM edit delete reply
as a mid-twenties bisexual male with probably not as epic a beard, NEVER feel embarrassed about squealing.
Cas 13th Apr 2016, 12:23 AM edit delete reply
Do we have a ship name for this yet? If not i suggest SS Emin or something cool any ideas at all?
PCBenjima 13th Apr 2016, 8:56 AM edit delete reply
Emily McRainface? ^_^
Guest 13th Apr 2016, 3:20 PM edit delete reply
Pretty sure their ship name is Raimily or Rainily.
4C51 13th Apr 2016, 12:52 AM edit delete reply

OhgeeSunny 13th Apr 2016, 1:54 AM edit delete reply
I'm so happy for them! I was concerned it would not happen but here we are. I bet it won't be an easy realtionship, but i really hope it works out for them.
JaxRhapsody 13th Apr 2016, 3:21 AM edit delete reply
You people are hilarious.
Reimi 13th Apr 2016, 4:14 AM edit delete reply
Alright, got all the squees out of my system now. Sad to see the chapter end, and knowing a hiatus is on the way, but what a way to end it! And ahead of schedule! Can't wait to buy volume 4 once it is ready!
say Taylor 13th Apr 2016, 6:08 AM edit delete reply

...I am content.
AmbiguousMouse 13th Apr 2016, 11:04 PM edit delete reply
Well nobody else did it, so I'm gonna go ahead and be that one girl. *insert middle schooler-style snicker here followed by singsong voice* They're like sisters~ This makes incest~
Guest Guy 15th Apr 2016, 11:18 AM edit delete reply
Incest, incest, It's the best!
put your sister to the test!
Eliza 14th Apr 2016, 11:18 AM edit delete reply
So I really wish the final page of this three page update was my computer background.
anon 14th Apr 2016, 4:09 PM edit delete reply
Nietzsche in thus spoke zarathustra and many other works tells us to forgo any consequences, ideas, etc. that hold us back from our going under and becoming or bridging to become/help create the übermensch. So although there may be risk or horrible consequences we should not hold back from taking them to become a better us. Ill leave you with this quote by him “For believe me! — the secret for harvesting from existence the greatest fruitfulness and the greatest enjoyment is: to live dangerously! Build your cities on the slopes of Vesuvius! Send your ships into uncharted seas! Live at war with your peers and yourselves! Be robbers and conquerors as long as you cannot be rulers and possessors, you seekers of knowledge! Soon the age will be past when you could be content to live hidden in forests like shy deer! At long last the search for knowledge will reach out for its due: — it will want to rule and possess, and you with it!”

― Friedrich Nietzsche, The Gay Science: with a Prelude in Rhymes and an Appendix of Songs
Guest Guy 15th Apr 2016, 11:16 AM edit delete reply
I am choking to death on happy throat noise foam
Mikasi 16th Apr 2016, 1:21 AM edit delete reply
I kinda wish I could upvote or +1 comments because so many of these need it.
AmbiguousMouse 22nd Apr 2016, 1:49 AM edit delete reply
I already commented earlier, but you see these two adorable and really emotionally close girls sharing their first kiss?

Remember how one said the other seemed like a skank?

Man, how things change.
Bane 26th Jun 2016, 10:20 AM edit delete reply
I just recently remembered Rain and I'm all caught up again and this is amazing as hell!
Akane 17th Jul 2016, 11:13 PM edit delete reply
They're so adoorablee <3
And now I've just considered that I've read this whole complete chapter, the one that was running for the longest so far AFAIK, in one single night. Wow. After this much rough and tumble, I really hope there's more good for them in sight ^^
Guest 13th Sep 2016, 7:41 PM edit delete reply
Miamistax 10th Oct 2016, 1:39 AM edit delete reply
* takes off glasses, wipes tears from eyes, puts glasses back on *
dempsy40 4th Nov 2016, 5:20 PM edit delete reply
YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS. Sorry i should compose myself but catching up with rain was a great idea so far!
Sarah 19th Nov 2016, 4:54 PM edit delete reply
Love it.
LGBT_Izzy 6th Apr 2017, 5:22 PM edit delete reply
I was reading this at school, and I just suddenly just shouted "FINALLY!" out of nowhere.
Guest 7th Mar 2018, 5:28 PM edit delete reply
Emily 8th May 2018, 12:19 AM edit delete reply
This hit a million times harder on the second read.

It makes me lonely, a little bit desolate-feeling.

I'm so happy for them.

It gives me hope.

I just . . . don't know . . . this is too much for me right now.
Troywhoisyaboi 8th Feb 2020, 5:30 PM edit delete reply
Omg omg omg! This is the greatest thing ever!
SpeedyQuidKid 25th Sep 2020, 1:32 AM edit delete reply
Well this comic has been a trip lol (a good one!). At first, I very much shipped Maria/Rain, and then didn't much like Ruby/Rain, and then even though I still shipped Rain with Maria, Maria and Chanel became a thing and it was too adorable not to ship. And then there was a nice long buildup to Emily and Rain and I was hesitant at first but by the time I got to this I definitely wanted it to happen haha. Good writing! Hope that it works out cuz they're not only cute but really good for each other, so far.
no 12th Nov 2020, 2:40 PM edit delete reply
Gaborbutch 29th Nov 2021, 3:24 AM edit delete reply
Yes! Yes! Yes! Who would have ever thought that I would just shout out loud from a comic page? And yet I did. I am not even into shipping, but this had to happen so much. Oh my gosh they are so cute together! It may be hard, but I am with them every step of the way (even if only from the other side of the screen)
Elyssa 17th Apr 2022, 1:49 AM edit delete reply
I discovered this comic around 3pm this afternoon. I am still more or less in the closet, even to myself, especially to myself. But this comic has been a fantastic read. SO much so that I binged the first 821 pages in just under 9 hours. There are too many things I still don't know, about who I am, and about what I want, but I'm relating to a lot of these characters(particularly Drew, Ky, and Rain). I still don't know exactly who I am, but this webcomic is making it easier to accept who I could be.
So thank you, really and truly thank you.
PS: I'm not 100% certain yet, but I do believe that Elyssa might be the right name for me. Might be who I really am, Elyssa and not Zac
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