Comic 692 - Awakening

2nd Jul 2015, 5:14 PM in Ch. 25: Wings
Average Rating: 4.96 (23 votes)
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Author Notes:

Jocelyn 2nd Jul 2015, 5:14 PM edit delete
Whoa... O_O




I think the last time I felt this anxious about posting something was probably the day I came out online. I've known this day would come for a very, very long time (and technically speaking, I'm proud of how it came out), but it's still a lot to take in. It's intense, and it's sudden, and it's messed up, and I'm sure a lot of people aren't going to like this.

But yes. That really happened. That part was not a dream.

I'll understand if people are upset, but please bear with me on this one.

On a lighter note, while this is the chapter end, there's still technically one more page (which will be followed by some much needed Rain Delays, I think).

Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.
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Nightsky 2nd Jul 2015, 5:43 PM edit delete reply
Oh... Sonnuva...

Kellen needs to die.
Faith 2nd Jul 2015, 5:49 PM edit delete reply
I was not ready for this, at all...legitimately really sad.
Zackwell 2nd Jul 2015, 5:51 PM edit delete reply
Where's Maria when facial features need to be rearranged?
shastab24 2nd Jul 2015, 5:53 PM edit delete reply
When I was living with my dad, who is disapproving of my transition and constantly wanted me to cut my hair, I was constantly afraid this sort of thing would happen to me. It didn't, but I know other people haven't been so lucky. Some people may think "it's just hair, it'll grow back", but the trauma can be horrible. In my position, it was that my long hair was the only bit of femininity I could express as I couldn't be female at his house (and considering he lived far away from anybody and when I could get into town I was looking for a job, there was no hope there), so that was a big thing. But it can even go to self-image, when you feel that it's the only way you can look like you, as well as simply part of your image overall, how you express yourself.

I feel for Rain. Nobody should have to deal with a situation like that.
Alex 2nd Jul 2015, 5:55 PM edit delete reply
I have to admit, this page hit me hard. I have a transphobic mother, and if I cut my hair like a boy's, she'd do what she could to make me lengthen it.

Goodness, now I just feel like crying. I can't wait until the next chapter!
Jen 2nd Jul 2015, 6:05 PM edit delete reply
I love my hair long, this freaks me out a little, because if anyone ever cut my hair without my permission, I would pretty much turn to the nuclear option -- no holds barred -- they would be arrested for assault, and then I would destroy them in any other (legal) way I could.
Zii 15th Sep 2015, 10:39 PM edit delete reply
I'm afraid that *I* would be more likely arrested for assault.... ;_;
Rain Beau Dash 2nd Jul 2015, 6:14 PM edit delete reply
I'm speechless (but still want to express my speechlessness)
Malicious Siren 2nd Jul 2015, 6:30 PM edit delete reply
UGH 2nd Jul 2015, 6:32 PM edit delete reply
seriously FUCK kellen
Nama 2nd Jul 2015, 6:32 PM edit delete reply
Burn the sister at the stake. Doooo iiit.
Devgirl Neko 2nd Jul 2015, 6:38 PM edit delete reply
SnapGrunt 2nd Jul 2015, 6:39 PM edit delete reply
Curse you kellen
Alexi 2nd Jul 2015, 6:45 PM edit delete reply
WTF Kellen?! This is just awful on so many levels. That would not be okay to do to ANYBODY, and it is much worse in context. Just... I can't even express what I'm trying to say. Damn.
Devgirl Neko 2nd Jul 2015, 6:47 PM edit delete reply
Unlike Gavin and Aiken, at this point, Kellen is a permanent antagonist for me. There is NOTHING she could do to redeem herself at this point and if she were my sister, she'd be dead to me. I'd be surprised if Rain ever talks to her again after this. I sure wouldn't.
LQ 2nd Jul 2015, 6:56 PM edit delete reply
You assaulted your sister! WTF!?
Mina 2nd Jul 2015, 7:09 PM edit delete reply

Rain's last night nightmare, as well as EVERYTHING so far has been less horrible than that. Really, I'd want to go into this comic to hug Rain and SCREAM at Kellen. She's not even trying to understand Rain, okay, shame on her, but that's NOT a reason to do something as TRAUMATIC as this to Rain. NOT. A. REASON.
She's not even on HRT, so she has no other way to look female without heavy makeup... Way to destroy a life, Kellen. Rain is strong, but with someone else, you'd lose your "baby bro" AND your sibling. Aren't you able to see your "baby bro" has always been this cute baby sis? Dammit, she's still the same! Just happier! >.<
At least Emily-the-awesome-friend is here for Rain... She'll probably talk to Kellen.

I'm super-mad at Kellen now. But not at you Jocelyn, so the comic is a success. I can't wait for the next page! ~

*Hugs Rain*
Mookie 2nd Jul 2015, 7:22 PM edit delete reply
While I appreciate the gravity of the situation, am I the only one who thinks Rain still looks cute with short hair, possibly even cuter?

But yeah, Kellen is shit. 0/10, worst girl. Even worse than Tharja. *cross fandom references, YEAH!*
Dawn 2nd Jul 2015, 11:45 PM edit delete reply
Her hair is cut pretty sloppily now, but I can imagine when it gets styled that it will look incredibly cute. I think short hair on girls looks adorable in general and I wish I could get a short haircut.

Though Rain's only thought is probably "I LOOK LIKE A BOY." It's a lot different for a transgirl, I think.
Rainbow Renly 6th Jul 2015, 6:18 PM edit delete reply
Yeah, I know I personally actually find girls with short hair really attractive but if I just flip the situation and imagine if I, as a trans guy, was like in an instant given long hair that would take as forever to be short again I would FREAK and think about how "I look like a girl" and not that there are plenty of long-haired male hairstyles.
Aspen Starscape 2nd Jul 2015, 7:33 PM edit delete reply
Wow, I'm really impressed at Rain's semi-subconscious interpretation of Kellen's actions. Even in her sleep, Rain believes that Kellen is, ultimately, motivated out of caring about the "baby bro" that Kellen remembers, and also motivated by their father's lingering shadow.
That's an incredibly loving and forgiving stance for Rain's brain to take. If I were her, I would just assume that Kellen did it out of pure spite.
I wonder if Rain will continue to hold that perspective now that she's fully awake.
Absentia 24th Apr 2021, 2:52 PM edit delete reply
Actually, I have a theory that its not just Rain interpreting Kellen's reasons. I think Kellen ACTUALLY said those last few lines out loud after she did the deed. Rain unknowingly heard her in her sleep, so the lines transfered over to the dream.
Tualha 2nd Jul 2015, 8:24 PM edit delete reply
Shades of Mitt Romney. And it also reminds me of the terribly sad scene in *Ma Vie en Rose*.

Well, Kellen is confirmed as a first-class bitch, but you know what? Rain's pretty upset now, in denial, but I think she's going to go to anger quite fast, during which time she'll give Kellen the bitch-slap she so richly deserves, skip over bargaining, spend just a little time in depression, and reach acceptance in less than an hour. And then she's going to go back to the con with a cute short girly haircut and knock 'em dead, because FUCK YOU KELLEN, YOU DON'T GET TO DECIDE MY GENDER.
Canadian Guy 2nd Jul 2015, 8:30 PM edit delete reply
Ok I hope the Aunt goes all psyco momma on the sister and shaves her bald.
Like this is a force feeding of punches time.
SnapGrunt 2nd Jul 2015, 8:41 PM edit delete reply
I hope so too
SnapGrunt 2nd Jul 2015, 8:43 PM edit delete reply
Or at lease do something that will scare kellen straight
j-eagle12212012 2nd Jul 2015, 8:53 PM edit delete reply
I have to be honest, this page hits close to home... my hair means a lot to me, the fact that it is long enough to put it in a pony tail means the world to me... the fact that this is something that can happen irl is what makes this page work so well...

*Applause* well done Jocelyn this page is a masterpiece in storytelling

I look forward to the next chapter and the continued ride on this amazing Emotional rollercoaster

P.S. (fellow bronies will get this)

Kellen has reached Diamond Tiara lvl of irredeamability
Rae 2nd Jul 2015, 10:01 PM edit delete reply
Are you sure it goes that far? I mean Diamond Tiara is pretty bad, and Kellen has f'd up here, but are you sure she can't be redeemed? Isn't there some hope? Maybe?
j-eagle12212012 2nd Jul 2015, 10:50 PM edit delete reply
I don't think there is anything she can say or do that will redeem her here... she crossed the line by altering Rain's appearance an "I'm sorry I was wrong you are my baby sis" is not going to fix things
Rainbow Renly 6th Jul 2015, 6:22 PM edit delete reply
MLG Samantha 5th Aug 2020, 7:44 PM edit delete reply
I dunno who y'all are talking about, but add Rachel from ToG to the list of people more redeemable than Kellen
Stephanie 2nd Jul 2015, 8:54 PM edit delete reply
Kellen is officially unforgivable now...Holy can't wait to see what Fara does to her
HellHathNo 2nd Jul 2015, 9:20 PM edit delete reply
Noooo... Rain :(
I wish I could pass through the fourth wall so I could punch Kellen in the face! >:O
Amy Midnight 2nd Jul 2015, 9:21 PM edit delete reply
I want Kellen DEAD! I want her house BURNED to the ground!
SnapGrunt 2nd Jul 2015, 9:23 PM edit delete reply
I hope Emily holds kellen down and rain cuts Kellen's hair beyond repair
kyuubi no kitsune-hime 2nd Jul 2015, 9:49 PM edit delete reply
This one was hard to read, really hard to read... I would totally disown any family member that did anything remotely that horrible to me on purpose. That is unforgivable, totally and irreversibly unforgivable.

My hair is really valuable to me, like many other trans and bio girls, so this one actually made my heart sink quite a bit. I mean brought tears to my eyes level emotional pain. I personally had to cut my hair short once when I got a job where a TERF of a boss made me present male, because she was a horrible person. Getting my hair cut that time, it made me cry, but I had no choice, it was after my father had a heart attack and I desperately needed the job to support him. Just like with that boss I had, Kellen can never be forgiven for damaging a girl like that.
Zii 15th Sep 2015, 10:48 PM edit delete reply
;_; You're incredibly strong, princess. I'm sorry you had to go through that... That sounds potentially illegal, but I know state laws and whatnot... V_V I'm so sorry... *hug*
Vanessa 2nd Jul 2015, 9:57 PM edit delete reply
Lemonado Boy 2nd Jul 2015, 10:25 PM edit delete reply
I'm going to need 5 Gundams, 3 Warp Stars, a couple metric tons of kerosene, a lighter, and one Kellen in desperate fear for her life. This bitch is gonna wish she was Antginy Carver when I'm done with her. At least I gave him a quick death by minigun.
Jude P. 2nd Jul 2015, 11:29 PM edit delete reply
You can literally go to prison for that. It's considered a form of assault because hair is considered to be part of the body.

I don't know if I could bring myself to press charges against a sister like that but if I were Emily I would be calling the police.
Jude P. 3rd Jul 2015, 4:35 PM edit delete reply
And just wait until Fara sees this.
mecaterpillar 3rd Jul 2015, 12:15 AM edit delete reply
Whoa. That was intense. It made me cry myself. It *feels* like this action was specifically chosen to induce a lot of dysphoria. However, thinking about it, I doubt Kellen would have ever thought about dysphoria (and hence may not understand the full consequences of what she's done.)

Also, I'm thinking that Kellen's words on panels two and three were lines she actually spoke. They make sense that way but don't in the dream itself.

After the getting past this initial shock and initial reaction, I imagine that Rain will be enraged. And after that I doubt that Emily and Rain will go to the last day of the con. I'm expecting Aunt Fara will be called very soon and they'll go back to Centerville. I also don't know how they'll fix Rain's hair. Is there something that can be done? I would think if there is, it'll be expensive, given that hair extensions and wigs are expensive. Will Aunt Fara be able to handle all of this? She's the one who'll have to do the most in supporting Rain, as we all know. I'm thinking Jessica should come along and help given the situation.
SnapGrunt 3rd Jul 2015, 12:23 AM edit delete reply
The worst part is that the night before aiken was explaining to Kellen that trans people can commit suicide and she ignored that. I can just imagine the worst possible outcome
Lemonado Boy 3rd Jul 2015, 12:59 AM edit delete reply
The really bad part is when Kelken promises Aiken she'll talk to Rain about this whole thing to at least try to understand her, rather than just be obstinate, which makes me doubly mad at her. She did this, and in doing so broke a promise. I can only imagine how Aiken will react to that.
SnapGrunt 3rd Jul 2015, 1:49 AM edit delete reply
So now we know that everyone hates kellen in the story & in real life. Allen for breaking an important promise & aunt fara + all rains friends for ruining rains life
defo18 3rd Jul 2015, 1:17 AM edit delete reply
I wasn't expecting this
I thought something happy would happen
SnapGrunt 3rd Jul 2015, 1:35 AM edit delete reply
And I just released this is my fault because in "so much chatting" I mentioned seeing both of rains eyes. I deserve to go into a desert and try to toast breast on the world's largest toaster but it won't work because my weight will not be able to pull down the switch... and their are not power outlets in the desert.
J 3rd Jul 2015, 1:42 AM edit delete reply
This so incredibly well done in story telling. How the dream became reality, now it makes perfectly sense, that cutting the wings off is done without blood.
The turning point, Aiken spoke to Kellen, she got new information, she could witnes Rain, and insteed of deciding to accept, she chose to try hard to undo what can't be undone (because it was never done, it was there the whole time).
sky14kemea 3rd Jul 2015, 2:34 AM edit delete reply
burn the witch! burn the witch!

this is one of few comics that made me actually react out loud. It was like a punch to the stomach. D: poor Rain
DocMesa 3rd Jul 2015, 2:49 AM edit delete reply
This would be horribly invasive thing to do even to someone that wasn't transgender. It's a fairly typical attempt to assert dominance and control over someone and you see it a lot in partner abuse. Makes me wonder if Rain's dad ever did it to his wife?

I think you crossed a red line there Kellen. Its going to take something almost miraculous to get Rain to trust you again.
Zimerick 3rd Jul 2015, 2:50 AM edit delete reply
Nothing some hair extensions can't fix right? Right?! I feel absolutely terrible for Rain, but can we 100% say for sure this was Kellen's doing? Could it be possible that Rain might have sleep walked and did this to herself because of Kellen's words in the previous days and for the fear of her father in her nightmares? I'm sure that's probably an unlikely scenario but either way, dammit Kellen! Your ass is dead now for this! Not only is she going to be yelled at by Emily, but Aiken and Fara as well. Anyways, I have to admit it doesn't look TOO bad, short hair does look nice on women and surely it's nothing some styling or extensions couldn't fix.
DocMesa 3rd Jul 2015, 3:07 AM edit delete reply
That's a good point. Kellen has a motive and Rain saw her face in a dream sequence...but it doesn't mean Kellen's hands were definitely on the scissors. Jocelyn may surprise us by saying it was Rain herself, or Emily or even Randy.
Random 3rd Jul 2015, 4:05 AM edit delete reply
Real life events, like talking, can bleed into dreams and Kellen is the only one to call her Baby Bro
AmbiguousMouse 26th Feb 2016, 3:57 AM edit delete reply
You're rught, how did I not see it? The villain was Randy all along!
Niceguy Eddie 3rd Jul 2015, 11:09 AM edit delete reply
I was thinking the same thing. And what a twist it would be if it WERENT Kellen!
DocMesa 3rd Jul 2015, 3:13 AM edit delete reply
Last comment before work - for those talking about attacking, killing and blowing Kellen, its unnecessary.

"All the tortures of Hell are better than an eternity alone."

Kellen is going to become very familiar with that saying soon.
T-Dog 28th Jul 2015, 7:16 PM edit delete reply
Aiken is possibly the only family she could interact with in the foreseeable future. And that may be a little time out, except for the fact he is kind of crashing on her couch right now.
Erin 3rd Jul 2015, 3:48 AM edit delete reply
Welp. Enjoy being abandoned by everyone you love until your deathbed, Kellen. Except your father. You seem to have a lot of things in common.
Hitman 3rd Jul 2015, 4:53 AM edit delete reply
Kill Kellen.
................... 3rd Jul 2015, 4:56 AM edit delete reply
This is so traumatic to your readers.......
Take this out.
DocMesa 3rd Jul 2015, 5:44 AM edit delete reply
Why? Really shitty things happen to trans people in real life and I'd be willing to bet really shitty things have happened to Jocelyn too. =|

We shouldn't run from things like this. We shouldn't try to block them out and pretend everything's alright. I believe Rain is strong and I believe she will be okay, much like most of her readers.
Jorie 3rd Jul 2015, 6:23 PM edit delete reply
I have to agree. As a trans woman myself, I can attest to people saying and doing terrible things to us out of hate, spite, or trying to change us(I've been lucky and never had something quite this terrible done to me, but I know it's happened to others).

It was hard to read, very emotional to say the least, but ultimately it's good storytelling. I fully believe Rain can and will triumph over this hardship, and considering this is a comic with a transgirl protagonist, *something* like this is important to include IMO. Like the page a few chapters ago when Rain was feeling really dysphoric, shit like this (not always exactly this act, but in the same vein of awfulness) is a reality of tans peoples' lives, and to fail to include it would, in my humble opinion, be a very unfortunate ommittance from a work that seeks to portray the day-to-day life of a trans person in modern day society.
The Delorean. 3rd Jul 2015, 4:59 AM edit delete reply
If your serious about doing this and not willing to erase this page and go a different route.

Then no rain delays.
DocMesa 3rd Jul 2015, 8:05 AM edit delete reply
I imagine writing and drawing this was pretty brutal for Jocelyn. I think she probably needs some Rain delays if she's to feel okay continuing.
Jorie 3rd Jul 2015, 6:26 PM edit delete reply
Further, do you really have a right to demand anything from an author who freely supplies this webcomic to you to read? O.o
please 3rd Jul 2015, 5:00 AM edit delete reply
Please take this out. PLEASE.
Laurie_A 3rd Jul 2015, 5:39 AM edit delete reply
KEEEEEEELLLLLLLEEEEEEEEENNNNNNN!!!!!!!! It is time for you to die!!!! Or at lest be disowned by the rest of the family.

On a lighter note, I bet Aiken moves in with Rain and Fara.
SnapGrunt 3rd Jul 2015, 5:42 AM edit delete reply
We have to wait for the afterchapter-full-of-dialogue-usually-few-people-read-but-cliff-hanger page heres one I just found
Chase 3rd Jul 2015, 8:32 AM edit delete reply
Fantastic page, if not slightly yikes-inducing. I commend you for portraying such a traumatic situation so well, and so respectfully. I may be hurting with Rain right now, but it only increases my sympathy for your wonderful character. :)
Ian 3rd Jul 2015, 9:58 AM edit delete reply
I have been going through this comic series from front to... well now and this comic is an absolutely excellent read. This has also taken me into what it could be like to be a trans* person (having grown-up around various sexualities and gender-identities). You truly are an amazing person with an exceptional talent for story-telling and drawing. FYI, I'm a homosexual, cis-gender, male with sideburns and a goatee who listens to heavy metal and occasionally wears black nail polish, make-up (corpse-paint), a kilt (skirt/dress) and earrings, but who's to say something should be defined as masculine or feminine or both or neither.

P.S. I thought the music would be fitting. It's Wings for Marie/10,000 days by Tool
Alyce of Hearts 3rd Jul 2015, 10:55 AM edit delete reply
This hit so hard I just had to post. I've been following Rain since the beginning, and it's always hit pretty close to home, both good and bad and this, omg, I just don't even have words. Rain, hun, all of my love!
Fox 3rd Jul 2015, 11:56 AM edit delete reply
First, I want to say that this is amazing story telling. Second, Kellen is a horrible person, this is assault. This made me cry. Even though I am a transgender man, I can relate to this having had a huge chunk of my hair cut out of my bangs by my father as a kid that made my hair look horrible, I looked like someone took a chainsaw to my hair and was teased by the other kids because it was not salvageable. I hope Kellen gets everything she deserves for this.
Guest 3rd Jul 2015, 12:31 PM edit delete reply
"Also, hopefully all goes well, but call or text me anytime if you need to come home sooner. Even in the middle of the night. I promise I won't be drinking and I'll be right over." -Fara, Comic 597, Sour. I see some late night discipline going on in the near future.
Kristalcosmic 3rd Jul 2015, 2:53 PM edit delete reply
wow, as a long term reader this hits hard, this comic was a bit more lighthearted than the other trans* comics I've read and usually avoided violence and such but it just got real fast. I didint expect it, it is truly heartbreaking, and im not quite sure what to do now. So vested in the story I suppose I should stick around but the emotions it illicits are so intense.
Faelyn 3rd Jul 2015, 4:18 PM edit delete reply
I am glad I read this after you did the secondary post, I had to just sort of skip past that last part and click next...

As someone who has had to struggle with that ever looming possibility for years between a few family member threatening it as well as a couple friends threatening it this strikes really close to home. Worst off is I don't know how I would react if it was family but I do know the last person to try had 12 stitches in there hand and a broken nose. So if they succeeded I don't know what would end up happening... though I would have to say they would have to have a death wish to do it, since it is one of the few things I have always seriously responded too.
Cant settle on a username 3rd Jul 2015, 6:59 PM edit delete reply
Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck what the fuck what the flying flipping fuck alright someone get on making a machine that lets be physically insert myself into the comic so I can strangle Kellan and punch her in her stupi bitch face
Cant settle on a username 3rd Jul 2015, 7:02 PM edit delete reply
As a sidenote that was an amazing twist and I'm very impressed by how much was said with such a subtle almost minor thing now that that's out of the was I can go back to burning Kellan in effigy
SnapGrunt 4th Jul 2015, 12:13 AM edit delete reply
I hope Jocelyn doesn't pull a flashback from went rain twince was a child and kellen is just getting revenge because lil' rain did that but can't remember
TheFTM 4th Jul 2015, 8:09 AM edit delete reply
Holy crap! I'm guessing the A-hole who did this is Kellen seeing as Aiken is beginning to accept Rain for who she is and wouldn't do it now. I know Emily for sure didn't and I highly doubt that ninjas snuck in through the window. Now, I love the fact that you made this page. I'm probably not supposed to love the fact that it's here, but I do because it needed to be made because there should be controversy over Rain's transition especially seeing as Kellen only recently found out. I think it's good that it's here. I just hope that Kellen in some major trouble over it. Like if I was Rain I'd be pissed. With a capital P. I hope for a confrontation in the next chapter, but I'll probably love whatever you do with it 'cause even when I've thought something should happen before I'd read the next page and like what you did better. So, in the end this page is a new beginning. Albeit a sad beginning, but a much needed one. So, thanks for writing Rain Jocelyn!
Jade 4th Jul 2015, 10:32 AM edit delete reply
Rain could 100% rock a pixie cut, own it gurl.
vorpal 4th Jul 2015, 11:37 AM edit delete reply
I am a cis-man with long hair, and even I would be furious and devastated if someone did this to me. I am so saddened for Rain, but I know she will have the strength and support to overcome this latest adversity.

Jocelyn, thank you for sharing such a phenomenal and powerful story with us.
Guest 4th Jul 2015, 11:53 AM edit delete reply
You can see how good of a writer Jocelyn is by how much she gets us to want to murder the face out of Kellen. The comments are real.
Guest 4th Jul 2015, 6:22 PM edit delete reply
It legit took me like a minute to figure out what happened, I thought she was like, sick or something. :P
Nobody Special 5th Jul 2015, 2:33 AM edit delete reply
What Kellen did is seriously unforgivable that's just like hurting someone in my book but It doesn't need to be all bad to a extent there are cute short cuts, extensions are a option if she's insecure about length so Rain should be fine though forgiving her sister might be a real issue
Seven_Mars 5th Jul 2015, 6:01 AM edit delete reply
This page is AMAZING. Seriously. It was beautifully written, drawn, and paced, and I actually felt the trauma (that is a good thing, I swear!). Might be one of my favourite pages to date! I am glad you took the story in this direction, because a) this will make Rain stronger and more confident in her femininity in the end, and b) it's good drama!

Great job! I loved every second of it!

To all the people whining about it and demanding it be taken down or saying they're done with the comic now: to quote Elsa, "Let it go." Seriously, people. Jocelyn didn't murder a puppy or anything, she wrote her story the way it has to go. If this is something the characters would do, it is an injustice to them and to the entire story to betray that and do otherwise. Rain is strong and will only get stronger, and if you stick around you will see her come out of this better and more beautiful than ever.

More importantly: OMG Rain is so adorable with a pixie cut!
Jinxi 5th Jul 2015, 4:05 PM edit delete reply
I... wow. I can't even. I've been rendered completely unable to even. There were pictures and words and then I heard myself swearing. Gods. That's powerful, hurtful, awful stuff. I would have been absolutely destroyed if I were in Rain's shoes. I'm not sure she hasn't been. Her friends better be as amazing as I think they are, because she's gonna need them a lot after this.
Butterfly 6th Jul 2015, 12:44 AM edit delete reply
Some people have told me to cut my hair. I do not, nor do I care that they are blood relations. Relationship by blood is given more meaning by society than it really has, in my opinion. Anyway, my hair is what I have been allowed to have without open opposition. Nor do I know how I would want it to be cut anyway. If this happened to me, well, I won't go there. This just hits far too close to home for comfort though.

What I do feel is that it is unforgivable. Kellen isn't even trying at this point. All she gives a damn about is her own image of her family. She won't suffer Rain ruining that image, and so Rain is the one that pays for it. The sad thing is that if it were reality, Kellen wouldn't even have any repercussions for her actions. All I hope is that she gets what she deserves... though I don't know what that is.

Rain will need all the support Emily and her true family will give her. She is fortunate in that regard.
Butterfly 6th Apr 2022, 1:53 AM edit delete reply
Seven years.

If I could have told myself that I'd be okay, that things would work out, I don't think I'd have believed myself. No "family" by blood. Living alone and getting by with my full time job. But I'm still here, despite everything. Depression, trauma, feels like I was dealt a bingo of neurodivergence. And yet, here I am. Over a year on HRT and on the wait list for surgery.

Slowly spreading my wings. It'll be nice to finally fly.

galactic.tentacles 7th Jul 2015, 10:25 PM edit delete reply
god this page...
I've been reading this story for a while. Its really opened my eyes to a lot of different issues going on in today's world.
This webcomic has one of the most unique, controversial, emotional (and relevant) stories I've ever read. Its awesome. Keep doing what your doing!

also kellen needs to go. go kellen. you've ruined everything.

jackrich 1st Aug 2015, 6:18 PM edit delete reply
Touch a fire, dear sister, and dream sweet smoke. Breathe me, love, I am what chokes you.
Chay 21st Aug 2015, 3:09 AM edit delete reply
This page. I found this comic a bit ago on tumblr and have been going through the archive. I'm genderqueer,and this hit me really hard. I started crying and worried my partner (who came out and held me until I calmed down.) I found this at a time when I've been dealing with a lot of dysphoria and just starting to be able to do anything about it, so I connected with that a lot.
I think you're doing a great job with the comic and am looking forward to seeing how Rain overcomes this.
Zii 15th Sep 2015, 11:27 PM edit delete reply
I've read all the comments now.

It's all I can do.

I can't do anything else tonight. I'm even scared of clicking "Next."


Emily seems so cold in this moment... it's hard....
mizore 13th Oct 2015, 10:23 PM edit delete reply
Well, one out of two sibilings not brutally murdered for being an assface is much better than i was honestly expecting that weekend to go.
Transginger 13th May 2016, 1:43 AM edit delete reply
I almost cried here.

When I was at summer camp, someone tried to do this to me. Of course it was a Christian summer camp, but I wasn't out or anything. I had mostly buried the idea of being trans in my head at the time, but I still had really long hair. As long, if not longer than Rain's. I was sitting on a bench and this guy snuck up behind me and tried to cut off my ponytail. Luckily, I felt it at the last second and turned my head so he only got a small part of it. But he still got some, and I was really upset.

Of course the guy didn't get in trouble, but I did for causing a scene.
AmbiguousMouse 17th May 2016, 8:56 PM edit delete reply
Wow, that's screwed up. He didn't get in trouble for taking a snip at your hair? And you got in trouble for trying to alert people to an attempted assault!? (Because, y'know, legally, that's assault.)

Man, people suck.
Akane 10th Jul 2016, 11:35 PM edit delete reply
Come on...what...what's happening...did I...just...get...completely wrecked emotionally by a fictional story?
Considering how I'm getting regularly remarked for my hair by my unsupporting environment, I've been afraid since the day I started growing it out that just the same might happen to me...fortunately it didn't yet's a very real thought and very real fear of, again, this was a blast very very close to I'm crying so heavily I just want to hug Rain like she was my own sister now :'(
The T.C. 14th Aug 2016, 6:21 AM edit delete reply
Give 'em a little chop-chop MOITE

Like this was actually the first page I saw before I started to read the comic, but I totally forgot about it since it's been bookmarked for so long and I only just now started binging.

And I guess it was a good thing because my heart sank so much D;
Lex-Kat 25th Nov 2016, 3:58 AM edit delete reply
If Kellen did do this, it is totally unforgivable! The only one who gets to cut my hair is my stylist, and only when I say so. D:
BGB 3rd Jan 2017, 2:52 PM edit delete reply
When I first read chapter 23, my thoughts on the characters were:
Kellen: Acting like my mom shortly after I came out to my family.
Aiken: Acting like my dad about a week after I came out to my family.
Emily: Acting like my sister when I came out to my family.

But then I got to this page, and I realized that Kellen is actually much, much worse than anything my mom ever did.
(My parents are both better now, fortunately, but it took time.)
Some Ed 16th Jun 2017, 9:32 AM edit delete reply
As an enjoyable read, this was by far the worst page in your comic. As an engaging narrative, however, hands down the most powerful. You're amazing.
BASHparallel 15th Feb 2018, 2:57 PM edit delete reply
KELLEN FUCK YOU. i have never wanted to strangle a fictional character more than now.
Hannah 2nd Mar 2018, 6:31 PM edit delete reply
Fuck... rereading, and I knew it was coming, and it still gets me. >.<
Guest 7th Mar 2018, 2:33 PM edit delete reply
Gettin' real tired of your shit, Kellen!
Samantha Jane 29th May 2018, 6:13 PM edit delete reply
When I was 11 my parents threatened to cut my long hair. I told them I’d hate them for it and then broke down and hugged them. They’re not the most open-minded but I love them.
Anyway, Kelley CANNOT ne forgiven. I gave her leeway before but this is grounds for never speaking to her again and maybe even pressing charges, in all honesty.
Rusty of Black Company 26th Mar 2019, 12:43 PM edit delete reply
The worst...
meta 21st Mar 2020, 4:51 AM edit delete reply
.. i had to skip alot of the pages .. and the comments .. but .. just no.

Guest 26th Apr 2020, 8:54 PM edit delete reply
MLG Samantha 5th Aug 2020, 5:50 AM edit delete reply
Wow. I wasn't planning on commenting until I caught up to the current page, but this made me so absolutely, mind-bogglingly, gargantuanosly livid I had to change that. I never thought there would be a comic character that I would hate more than THAT CHARACTER from Tower of God, but Kellen Flaherty just managed to steal that title by a landslide.
SirCorgus 22nd Sep 2020, 3:23 PM edit delete reply
Kellen you bitch
Share 27th Oct 2020, 3:24 PM edit delete reply
If I was writing this story, I likely would have made kellen more supportive, maybe say “I always wished I Had a sister”, just to balance out the family a bit. But you did a good job with how you did it.
no 11th Nov 2020, 3:30 AM edit delete reply
oh god... nononononononono... this may be the first time i´ve ever actually felt sick over a comic; any story, really. given what i read, that probably says something. incredible job on the writing, even if it´s such terrible subject matter. the setup with the wings and the last page, then the reveal as you scroll down, the angles... this is great stuff.

on a lighter note, this is definitely the record for most comments so far.

Alex Buss 6th Jan 2021, 12:20 AM edit delete reply
All the fans unified against kellen
Dark Niwa 12th Jan 2021, 7:24 AM edit delete reply
first time i read this page i broke down crying myself, it still hurts, but atleast i'm not crying... poor Rain, thankfully she looks just as pretty in future pages with short hair, but this action just condemned Kellen in my eyes
Rin 17th Feb 2021, 1:55 PM edit delete reply
this is my first time reading, and i-
i literally broke down reading this page...
Rin 17th Feb 2021, 1:51 PM edit delete reply
I was not ready for that. Hit... pretty close to home. I was shaking after reading that...
Keiya 17th May 2021, 5:00 AM edit delete reply
I've read this before and was dreading this part because... I had actual nightmares after it last time. I'm in a much better place now, but it still hurts.
Lily Avocado 7th Jan 2022, 8:15 AM edit delete reply
Rereading this in preparation for the final chapter, and I gotta say, I’m really enjoying it, although some of the comments on here are kinda pissing me off. I know that this might hit a bit too close to home, (and I know this page is like 7 years old at this point) but you guys have absolutely NO right to tell Jocelyn to change/remove parts of the comic for being too depressingly realistic. In a story that strongly revolves around acceptance, not everything can be sunshine and rainbows all the time. Just be grateful that this comic is being posted publicly online for free. I only discovered it last year, But it’s very important to me, and I hope to buy the physical volumes one day. Thanks, Jocelyn.
Introvertgamer13 7th Mar 2022, 4:46 AM edit delete reply
There are two ways to respond to this sobs or the maniacal laughter of some one who is about to commit a homicide
Morrigan Eldritch 27th May 2022, 9:54 PM edit delete reply
So, this page is what made me but all the books that are available, this, this exact thing happened to me, I wasn't out yet and I was at a Friends house when I was sleeping his mom cut my hair off at the pony tail, it was my only form of expression cause I didn't know "trans" was a thing, I thought I was alone

Then my only form of expression was taken away from me, I felt broken, then I read this years later and I really feel a connection with rain
Pseudonym 22nd Oct 2022, 12:52 PM edit delete reply
JFC I'm so sorry to hear that, what is wrong with people?
Syrahl 27th Jun 2022, 12:13 PM edit delete reply
I'm rereading the comic at the moment. This page by itself doesn't hit quite as hard the second time around, but it's still damn rough.

On the other hand, all the optimism leading up to the convention, every page where Rain talked about potentially being able to make up with Kellen... just really hard to read when I knew what was coming for the poor girl. Added together, the second read felt a lot harder than the first one.
JustRaining 3rd Aug 2022, 6:18 PM edit delete reply
I just cannot express the shock. Wow bravo, artistic wise!
Waffle 17th Aug 2022, 4:24 PM edit delete reply
what does she even think this is supposed to accomplish? aside from upsetting everyone who cares about rain

Also, wow, this is going to be 'fun' at school.
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