This is incidentally the first (and hopefully last) three-pager. Originally, I just wanted to have the nightmare in a two-pager and save the last part with Emily for the following update. It flowed weird though, and it felt a little too cruel to leave people hanging on that note. I feel like no one would argue that this is probably one of the heavier scenes in the story to date. Mr. Flaherty is terrifying, and Rain's fear is outright tangible (at least to me). That said, I actually think it's one of my favorites in terms or art and writing. I'm just proud of how it all came out, even if it is hard to look at (which admittedly, is kind of the point).
I don't know if you intended it but
Is this some kind of implication of rape
He did say "I'll take it off for you"
This page really disturbed me and I have been reading this story since 2012
The normal part of me is creeped out by that "ill take it off for you" statement but then the fanboy part of me is screaming over the fact that they went to sleep with Emily embracing rain (just wanna point out that smile on her face on the last panel) IF THIS SHIP DOESNT BECOME CANON I WILL EXPLODE
Mr. Flaherty reminds me of one of the evil characters from the movie Sin City. That particular character eats people, and I'm sure Mr. Flaherty isn't that evil, but still shows the evilness. Really good concept Jocelyn :)
Might I be able to make a suggestion, I love what you've done in these scenes but I would suggest to thin out the outline of tears on Rains face in the last panel on the second page, it seemed as though she had smeared mascara, but if that's what you were going for it's all good, I just thought Rain had no makeup on before bed
Anyone here ever read Spider Robinson's novel "Mindkiller", or his short story "God is an Iron", which is basically the novel's second chapter? I don't see Rain's father as being THAT bad, but this scene does put me in mind of it. And Spider says he DIDN'T MAKE THAT STORY UP. Someone TOLD it to him. It really happened to her. Life doesn't get much more sickening than that ...
Wow...this just brought up so much of my own bitter past memories...I literally cried heavily myself...it hit me real hard ='(
I so, so, so much wish to hug Rain with sisterly love right about now.
It relates to one of my first, oldest memories. But it was my mom who caught me (as I don't have a father) and demanded I take it off before she got back home.
She stormed out of the house, and I went deeper into my closet, forgetting things and not understanding why I was so messed up.
She's supportive of me now, and doing her best to be understanding. And she doesn't remember the incident, at all. She totally blanked it out.
... I can't help but read Rain's gene donor's lines in the voice of Father from Kids Next Door, and I'm not sure if that's wrecking the drama or making it terrifying because that guy is scary when he's angry.
That was one of my fears as a kid, my mum or dad finding me in my sisters give away clothes. I can really relate.
P.S. I’ve only just started reading and have gotten this far in about a day.
Wow
You hit me hard
Is this some kind of implication of rape
He did say "I'll take it off for you"
This page really disturbed me and I have been reading this story since 2012
Not so much rape, but definitely abuse.
I am sorry for disturbing you so much. I admit I was a little afraid of posting this for exactly that reason.
From a writing stand point disturbing the audience is good
Keep it up
Even though he's just a silhouette, it makes me think of Alfred Drevis from Mad Father for some reason...
Dam girl I think your about to become big.
And I'm 31 and I can't come out to my Dad because he was the same way with me growing up.
This is some heavy stuff. The last two panels are needed to rebalance emotions for sure
Sadly I had the same thing happen to me but with my mother.
Anyone here ever read Spider Robinson's novel "Mindkiller", or his short story "God is an Iron", which is basically the novel's second chapter? I don't see Rain's father as being THAT bad, but this scene does put me in mind of it. And Spider says he DIDN'T MAKE THAT STORY UP. Someone TOLD it to him. It really happened to her. Life doesn't get much more sickening than that ...
I so, so, so much wish to hug Rain with sisterly love right about now.
It relates to one of my first, oldest memories. But it was my mom who caught me (as I don't have a father) and demanded I take it off before she got back home.
She stormed out of the house, and I went deeper into my closet, forgetting things and not understanding why I was so messed up.
She's supportive of me now, and doing her best to be understanding. And she doesn't remember the incident, at all. She totally blanked it out.
This is one of the cutest pages. Rain should adopt Emily as her sister! X3
Please be better than this turdnugget.
P.S. I’ve only just started reading and have gotten this far in about a day.