Comic 479 - Wish

9th Jan 2014, 7:34 PM in Ch. 19: Vincent's Story
Average Rating: 5 (13 votes)
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Author Notes:

Jocelyn 9th Jan 2014, 7:34 PM edit delete
This is where the chapter gets fun. ^_^

Incidentally, I don't think this is a terribly uncommon occurrence among trans folk (not that it's exactly a requirement either). Speaking purely for myself, any time growing up that I'd be told to "make a wish," only one thought ever came to mind (although, I wanted the opposite thing Vincent did... and I didn't shout out my wishes). And I took every opportunity! That's not just birthday cakes either. See also stars, wishbones, dandelions, eyelashes, necklace chains and - back when I was a religious kid - even outright prayer. I even considered including it on a Christmas list a couple times, but I was afraid my parents would read it before Santa saw, so I opted out. Looking back, I was a naive, little kid. Or maybe just desperate. XD

For what it's worth though, I STILL wish for the same thing on my birthday cakes. It's become like a reflex for me.

ANYway, given that Vincent is 35, this flashback would date back thirty years before the story's present day. So, this is SUPPOSED to be 1983. I had to do a Google Image search of that year to get an idea of how people should look to at least attempt accuracy, but I really don't know how well I did. It is kinda before my time (albeit only slightly). Looking at the dad, I think I got the glasses down though. XD

The "childhood story" Rain is referring to is, incidentally, the very first page. ;P

Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.
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Nightsky 9th Jan 2014, 8:22 PM edit delete reply
...He probably could have worded that better.
DocMesa 10th Jan 2014, 3:21 AM edit delete reply
No...I think that was word perfect! XD
KinglyPrince 18th Jan 2014, 11:40 PM edit delete reply
I second that! XD
Jen Done 10th Jan 2014, 3:13 AM edit delete reply
How concise, 5-year-old Vince XD
j-eagle12212012 10th Jan 2014, 7:49 AM edit delete reply
I also use every wish opertunity with "I wish I had been born a girl"
Jadelynn 10th Jan 2014, 1:55 PM edit delete reply
Yep. Definitely. Every single possible chance I had to wish, the first thing that came to my mind was "I wish I could go to sleep and wake up as a female." Of course, given that I thought these thoughts were strange and bad at the time, I would immediately go "what's wrong with me for thinking like this" . . .

I should probably tell my counselor about that
Jen Done 10th Jan 2014, 4:03 PM edit delete reply
I actually pushed it so far back into my mind that I didn't even think about it seriously until college. At some point thinking the hypothetical "I think my life would have been better if I was female, though I don't know why," suddenly made all those thoughts come crashing down on me again, and when I couldn't get it out of my head I realized it was for serious and not just a recent fancy. Retelling people early stories about my dysphoria shocked them, but it was all the more surprising to me that I could deny they ever existed or were important enough to dwell on. Even former therapists I've seen said they were dumbfounded when they heard that I'd come out, as I gave no indication of gender dysphoria when I was young. Well, no indication that I ever let on myself.

All the more reason that I'm happy with how far I've developed as a person through transition :)
From a butterfly 12th Jan 2014, 7:15 PM edit delete reply
Although I never asked myself "what's wrong with me?" I did spend 25 years trying to be a man, and after nights spent wishing I was born a girl, I'd get angry at myself and say to myself, "What are you thinking? Your SUPPOSED to be a man" that said "supposed to be," isn't "are" is it :)
Moor 10th Jan 2014, 7:39 PM edit delete reply
... Has everyone known since they were little?

The only memory I can pull from my childhood (although I do have pretty bad memory, so there's that) we when I was in Preschool, and they gave out colored paper to draw on, they'd always give out one blue piece of paper for every boy, and a pink piece for every girl -- and I'd always jump in and nab one of the pink ones.

I don't think I have any other stories...
Karen Lynn 11th Jan 2014, 12:03 AM edit delete reply
I didn't really know until a few years ago. I may have known earlier if I weren't so busy trying to drive the "perverted faggot thoughts"(mother's words) out of my head. I might have understood how I felt since I was six. Besides that, I didn't actually come to accept it myself until three, five years ago.
Jen Done 11th Jan 2014, 1:54 AM edit delete reply
I didn't put it together until college. Up until then I was busy pushing any feminine thoughts I had into the back of my mind where I often forgot about them. I was actually scared when it became apparent that lots of other trans* peeps knew for definite how they identified when they were really little. I was worried that I was making a rushed decision to transition, but so far it's been working out. It also addresses some of those issues I've had since childhood that I really couldn't figure out until I was much older.
Ethan 12th Jan 2014, 11:47 AM edit delete reply
I had no idea 'til I was 14, except for some vague memories I have that may or may not really mean anything. I always kinda feel like the only one who didn't know since birth. :P
Lilith 24th Jan 2015, 3:57 PM edit delete reply
I had so much other stuff to deal with, I didn't even start noticing until I was 19ish. It sure made a lot of stuff make since, looking back.
Tualha 4th Jun 2015, 3:20 AM edit delete reply
Rin for the win!

I didn't realize until my mid-30s. Complicated by being non-binary and not terribly dysphoric, plus a good helping of undiagnosed Asperger's.
Vikki McD 30th Aug 2020, 10:54 PM edit delete reply
Same here, although replacing "mid-30s" with "few months short of 23", and with my Asperger's having been diagnosed already.
Hooman Bean 12th Jan 2021, 12:07 PM edit delete reply
I've known since I was 11, but I kept getting told that I might be phase and I might feel differently when I'm older.
AriaOfEffect 17th Sep 2021, 2:53 PM edit delete reply
The clues were always there, but I didn't start putting them together until about 30!
ranger_brianna_new 12th Jan 2014, 1:33 AM edit delete reply
Jessica's reaction to Vincent's story matches my own. :P This is probably the funniest page on the comic so far.
Leigh.A. 12th Jun 2016, 6:44 PM edit delete reply
I didn't realise until a few months ago (I'm 12 btw), but i do remember that i always hated nearly everything stereotypically female, well nearly everything. Add being non binary and still comfused, also, not knowing you weren't always the same gender as you were at birth. And yeah, i was (and still am) confused
Akane 23rd Jun 2016, 10:07 PM edit delete reply
Yeah, I felt very strange about my male body as well since like age 5, but I never had the courage to say it out loud. And I take no notes of "wishing occasions", as I wake up, agonize through the day, and go to bed with the consistent and persistant wish that I had just been born a girl and could have experienced growing up and going to school as any other cis girl, whom I've largely envied for that matter.
Sky Beams 31st Jul 2016, 3:11 PM edit delete reply
WTF. Couldn't s/he have worded it better..?
Ruth 12th Aug 2016, 2:13 AM edit delete reply
Imagine what it was like in 1970 for parents to hear from their 8 yr old only son / youngest child with older sisters (took then 10 years of trying to finally have a boy) that he wished he'd been born a girl instead. First thing they thought was that I must be on drugs... and I never even had my first beer until I was 18 and about to graduate high school. The drinking age was 18 in 1980.
The T.C. 14th Aug 2016, 2:40 AM edit delete reply
You fool! Saying it out loud means it won't come true!! I blame the parents for not teaching him proper wishing protocol.
Lex-Kat 24th Nov 2016, 2:08 AM edit delete reply

I love the wish though. What a surprise. :D
Drew 6th Jan 2017, 4:27 PM edit delete reply
I have always been stealth, even as a little kid. xD I don't have any real stories from when I was little. Mostly just refusing to play a girl in pretend games and hating skirts, dresses, and pink. I was always the tomboy, it was surprising that no one noticed my being FtM trans. When I came out my dad was like, "When did you start thinking about this?" and I said, "Probably around the age of 4 years old."
LGBT_Izzy 26th Mar 2017, 9:17 PM edit delete reply
I am soooo happy my parents don't make me wear dresses. Even for church, I mean, today is Sunday, and I'm wearing a boys shirt! Man, I'm I lucky.
AllenTGM 25th Feb 2020, 6:36 PM edit delete reply
I read that part as I was eating gobstoppers (yes eating)and I cracked up so much that it fell out of my mouth.
Sean 26th Aug 2020, 9:05 PM edit delete reply
From the mouths of babes...
no 8th Nov 2020, 4:44 AM edit delete reply
i also took every opportunty to make the same wish over and over (still do, haha), but it wasnt a gender thing. it was broader than that, more of a superpower (not shapeshifting, before you ask), but i definitely would have exploited the gender loophole right away.

ok that made no sense but its hard to explain without going into too much detail
skrbunny 13th Sep 2022, 8:52 AM edit delete reply
oh gosh... the totally innocent enthusiasm that he put into that wish... that's... gold :)

i only remembered a couple months ago, when i was reading someone's story on reddit, or perhaps another comic, that.. silently i wished to transform... i mean, i never forgot that i wished that on stars... or as a child taking walks at night and just talking out loud to w/e God there might be...

but on my birthday cakes? with my parents and sibbling standing there? (i used to think my mom could read my mind... i mean, she told me she could, so...) ... but yeah... every year, same wish...
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