Late to the Conversation
6th May 2019, 9:49 AM in Ch. 37 - Prom Night
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Late to the Conversation
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Average Rating: 4.71 (7 votes)
Author Notes:
So, while Ky disrobes in the ladies room stall with Ana nearby (and Rudy and Gavin are presumably likewise in the mens room), Rain and Emily leave the ladies room, and find Chanel. She doesn't have much role to play in the switch (though I guess she could be lookout?), but I'm sure she'd rather be here doing anything with her friends than stuck answering Holly's uncomfortable questions (as we last saw Chanel). The three girls discuss the situation a bit, and Drew comes out into the lobby too.

Your thoughts?

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User comments:
AmbiguousMouse (Guest)
Yeah, I sense a recurring pattern. I mean, I'll be pleasantly surprised if he's learned his lesson, but... This feels like setup for yet another negative Drew reaction to Ky's genderfluidity. Just because everyone's around, and all that... Which sucks, because, I mean, he developed a crush on Ky in boy mode in the first place. Even wearing a tux, arguably (though that vampire costume was really a different thing altogether). I hope against the odds that he's able to just grow up and enjoy it, but again, I wouldn't bet on it.

Other thoughts... I can't decide whether Rudy's more likely to scoot by on sheer unrestrained flair, or if he'll get kicked out or attacked. There's so much room for things to go super wrong in this prom and I just want them to go really well and... whew, stress.
WaywardS0ci0path (Guest)
Oh my god, this is great. Can’t wait for the next chapter and I hope Drew comes around.
SilengNight (Guest)
I think there's a very important question that everyone is ignoring:

Is Ky going to keep the monocle, or will Ruby?
William (Guest)
The question has not been ignored.
SilentNight (Guest)
Right you are I see
MavisV (Guest)
Split it in half to get half-moon monocles
Pseudonym (Guest)
I'm more interested in whether Rudy will keep Ky's earrings. They're nice earrings. ("But Rudy doesn't have his ears pierced." "You mean didn't have his ears pierced." "Ouch.")
Idk (Guest)
Rain in that second to last panel, "c'mon drew I told you to use they"
Drake Zephyr
So, it seems Drew is genuinely concerned now, so that might help a bit. But I think it's more like that he doesn't really get how much Ky's identity is important to them. Which is understandable. He never really had any help in understanding the LGBTQ+ community. So I think it will take a while, but he'll come around.
Long-Time Lurker (Guest)
Ahhh Drew, not off to a good start here... Poor Ky. I hope he enjoys the night with his friends, even if Drew is being an ass and he has to ditch/dump him.
Right now would be a good time for Emily, Rain and Chanel to take Drew aside and give him a no nonsense, blunt, and quick training lesson on how to stop being a douche, and explain it in the simplest possible terms that even a snail’s brain could grasp the concepts.
Time to break out the finger paints!
Jessica Bright (Guest)
uggh drew. i really hope he changes because it's sure painful to see him like this
Matt (Guest)
Poor Drew,

It's very easy not to understand. Unless someone (anyone!) explains to you whats going on, how do you know what's going on?!?

Give the lad some slack; he needs as much understanding space as everyone else!
Some Ed
Yeah, this. Thinking back to when I was their age... I didn't have dysphoria anywhere near as bad as Ky gets, but I understood it about as well as Drew does. I could've easily been a big problem, except that I tend to shut down when I'm confused more than I tend to attempt to act to something with the confusion.
I really hope we see some character growth for Drew. It would really suck if he still hadn't learned anything even after being a second chance. I guess its because I'm cis and a guy that I really want to see cis guys in media getting their shit together and supporting LGBT folks, even in the very basic stuff like using the pronouns they've been asked to use.
I get where you're coming from. It's like back when there used to be racism (glad that's over with,wheeeww). But it was never in my corner. Couldn't accuse me of that! I'd just point out how some of my best friends were negroes. %^/

**KATHUNK!** (other shoe dropping)
Sorry, could you clarify your response for me? I don't quite understand it.
Guest Q (Guest)
No, it's not they for now. Rain is just being stupid and already knows Ky is in boy mode. You say he. Dumbass. They is for when you don't know or it's ambiguous. Or you're saying somebody is immensely fat.
Fox (Guest)
Ky never said they're in boy mode, only that they're not in girl mode, the could just as likely be feeling androgynous. Check this page again if you're still confused.
*they not the, silly typos
Fox (Guest)
Guest Q (Guest)
Seems you're confused.

Ky has mentioned androgenous mode but mostly we see the person in either girl or boy mode. And now wanting to switch into definitively masculine attire. If androgynous, something closer to the middle would be preferred. A masculine tuxedo would be just as annoying as that pretty prom dress.
Fox (Guest)
Seeing it less, doesn't make it less plausible. The tux is masculine yes, but that doesn't mean that Ky's presentation in it couldn't be androgynous or male, depending upon how they wear it. Especially, seeing as when they present androgynous, they lean masculine in attire, but feminine in appearance, ie lack of chest binding. Rain is using "they" out of respect because Ky has not stated which mode they're currently in and assuming would be incredibly rude. Basically, Ky could be in boy mode, but we have no definitive proof and neither do the main cast, so calling Rain names for erring on the side of respect is pretty presumptuous if you ask me, not to mention awfully hostile.
Guest Q (Guest)
But it does make it less likely. Mentioning plausibility makes sense if we're discussing genderfluidity only in general and not as to a specific person. But Ky is under consideration here and it makes sense to consider what is the usual for the person. The link you gave only reinforces what I've been saying. Ky described feeling such as which could be called androgyny and said, "it doesn't happen often."

If Rain wanted to be respectful, she'd stop using the plural to refer to Ky as though the person was big enough for two people. For when she's uncertain she could say the person. Not they. But here Rain has enough to go on to see which mode Ky is in. Saying what is or isn't proof here is irrelevant and is just obtuse.
Fox (Guest)
An example of how Ky looks in androgynous mode.
This comes across as a very angry and aggressive post. Would you want to see Rain punished for using an incorrect pronoun? Do you think Ky would want to see Rain punished for using an incorrect pronoun?
Guest Q (Guest)
Fox just wants to argue, not listen and isn't making any effort towards making sense, if that's what you're referring to. If not, try to be specific and less obscure.

Your questions about punishment are irrelevant. Nobody has asked for anybody to be punished. Your whole post seems to have an odd or misplaced agenda. It begs the question just what are you angry about?
@Guest Q

Ky has never said they were in boy mode. In fact, it's worth noting that Ky has pretty explicitly not said anything specific on any of their pages throughout this chapter (we don't technically even know exactly what they asked Rudy; we have an idea, but we didn't hear what they themself asked). All we actually know with certainty is that Ky is very uncomfortable being seen in their dress right now. Anything past that, is pure assumption on your part.

So, calling Rain a "stupid dumbass" seems a bit uncalled for, given she's been hanging out with Ky tonight, and likely talking with them off-camera. And that maybe instead of calling her out for being "disrespectful", we should be taking what Rain says as a clue that she knows something we don't yet.

Also, "they" is a perfectly acceptable singular pronoun. It has been for a long time, even. If you wanna argue in favor of respect, maybe you should start by trying not to discount the fact that a good chunk of this comic's readership uses singular they pronouns. You should also stop working exceedingly unnecessary and immature fat jokes into your posts.
Fox (Guest)
Thank you for weighing in Jocelyn, it's very appreciated to have this put to rest with 100% certainty because I wouldn't want this to turn into an issue.
author's spouse (Guest)
TIL that I'm "immensely fat". Thanks, Guest Q, that really helped me feel more confident in my gender identity. /s
Torne (Guest)
I am curious....
Why does Rain have italic text in her speech bubbles while everyone else does not?
I mean, I know the reason but wouldn't it be easier to write it plain font then use italic for the other voice?

Maybe it's just easier to keep doing it than going back and reworking it?
It’s supposed to represent her raising her voice to make it more feminine. That’s why the other characters don’t have italics- they’re speaking in their natural voice.
To clarify, I meant raising the pitch of her voice, not the volume.
Chrissy (Guest)
Not just the pitch, but also actively trying to change the sound of her speech. If you notice, Jessica's specifically is not italics because she's worked on her voice so much that it is her normal speech now. With Rain, her voice is still in the fake it part of fake it 'til you make it. And, just as a reminder, she's desperately trying to avoid having her voice crack.

The italics imply that she's actively changing her voice. I use italics for her and not everyone else, because she's the one doing something different with her voice. So, in turn, I do something different for her. As you say, it's not necessarily easy for me to do all the time, but it's also not easy for Rain to maintain.

As I've never personally been able to permanently change my voice, I think Rain's struggle being constantly represented is genuinely valuable. So while it can be a little hard to remember sometimes, I honestly like it this way. It's like Rain and I are doing our best together. ^_^
Torne (Guest)
That's what I thought. It's more representative than anything.

Thanks for the answer and reply!
Mavis the Rainbow (Guest)
Also remember Ruby had italics when he was playing the part
I sometimes wonder if I’ll ever be able to achieve a less masculine voice. I haven’t really put a whole lot of afford into it yet, since I’ve got so many other higher priority goals at the forefront currently, but what’s really frustrating is that until I was almost 40, I did have a naturally high pitched femmy voice. Got gendered as female by strangers on the phone all the time, but now I sound like a Classic Rock FM radio station DJ, which sounds so out of place for someone who is short, and is now looking really feminine . In my 20s, I was a wannabe rock musician and could easily sing the lead vocals to songs like Loverboy’s “Working for the Weekend”, “Turn Me Loose”, “The Kid is Hot Tonight”, and could *almost* hit the highest notes of Journey’s “Open Arms” which was the defacto “audition exam” used by all the small time rock bands in my local area music scene back in the early 1980s. Everybody knew that nobody from around could hit the highest notes, but they wanted to see just how much of that song anyone could sing before crashing and burning at an audition. I made it further along than anyone else around here could, but couldn’t sing the whole thing either. Didn’t have the duration to sing an entire 45 minute set of songs either without my voice being completely trashed by the end, so that was a career that wasn’t ever gonna happen for me. Nowadays, I can’t even get thru those old Loverboy songs anymore, but can do a damn good cover of Ric Ocasek or Ben Orr from The Cars tunes of the 70’s and 80’s, which looks really wierd seeing someone who looks like me now singing “Best Friend’s Girl” or “Bye Bye Love”. I can also still cover Chrissie Hynde/Pretenders “Brass in Pocket” which works very well with my looks nowadays...

But my speaking voice nowadays...... gawd it’s horrible. VFS is too darn risky and expensive, so not an option.
Drew Can deal, Ky has the right to be comfortable. Plus I think he is the one with the biggest "issue" with Ky's gender. honestly I don't think many even know ky came with drew
Cerberus (Guest)
I'm kind of out of patience for Drew. Like, he's been really awful to Ky and hurt them in ways that cut to the core of who they are.

Like, that's not necessarily a death sign for the potential of redemption, but I'm just not seeing the effort on his part. As much as he regrets his initial harm of Ky, he seems to have done no real work on himself actually accepting their gender as valid and really putting himself outside of himself and his wants.

Like, even after royally fucking up and being given a second chance, he's still resisting education on their pronouns and presentation, he's still centering his "normality" in the eyes of others, and worst of all, seems to expect everyone else to do the emotional labor of improving him.

Like, Rain's brother in his arc went off and did some serious work on his own and yet for Drew who keeps getting second chances, we're not seeing that level of effort for someone he claims to love and it sucks that Ky seems to be internalizing that they will need to settle themselves in this way to find love, essentially apologizing for who they are.

I hope Drew can turn it around, but I'm more and more in the camp of dump the asshole and move on.
Fox (Guest)
Drew is definitely refusing to make an effort to educate himself, since we know that the information is online, given Emily's talk of research, besides he's had this explained several times
so his ignorance is a choice at this point. Ky and Drew shouldn't be together until Drew gets past his issues and learns to be more respectful of others.
The_NPP (Guest)
If I had to guess, from the last couple of strips, it sounds like she's a LUG.
This is definitely going to be awkward